Hi Junghyun. You deserve my entry!

I grow up with Shinee's song. I always adore you guys because depsite of all pressure Shinee is the only boyband that seems to hold in very well (no one leaves, no big fuss) .Well, to be honest, Minho was my bias at that time. I also once had the glowstick but maybe now not anymore. I've been growing up so well up to this day, thank you so much Junghyun-ah. I always thought you as a savior of the situation or call it whatever you want. You always there to save everyone and to make things better. I learned all your videos/shows when I was really young. 

Little did i know, it will end like this.

I always love your music, your lyrics. It helps me a lot to write, helps me to fully expressed my feelings in my story. I'm bounded with sorrow. Not feeling sad, but sees everything in grey cloud. It's unhealthy and you proved me it is so unhealthy. But its helps me to write; that kind of feeling. Sometimes I addicted to feel that. All your songs are my favourite back then, because the of the frequency. It just feel like I want to say those words, and you expressed beautifully.

I always feel that I'm not good enough, I'm bad, I'm a faulty of the world. I always strict to myself. Yes is yes, no is no. Heart are fool, I adore logic thinking. Its weird that I somehow used my heart whenever I write.

Honestly, to be honest. I am so sad.

I am really sad.

I am totally shocked.

You once meant a lot to me, my source of inspiration. You are my heal. My wounds healed a little when I hear your song. Because it just feels like I am not the only one, your lyrics consoled me. I wish you know, that you did really well!

Great job Jonghyun-ah. Saranghae!

I believe you already think about this for a long time and just wait for the time. You had already scheduled arranged, you are hesitant. I understand.

You think a lot.

You don't want to end your life, but you want to end the pain.

Which i really understand.

I learned a lot. I won't ended up like you and that the least thing I can promise you oppa :) 

Your smile and your eyes seems alive to me. It still feels like a dream even until today. You did well, we all know.

Good job Junghyun! I will always cherished your music, your fairy personality. I will always remember you and your struggle.

xoxo. MiratheShawols.

It just malam-malam biasa yang sunyi. Kalau malam-malam sebelum ni aku tutup kesunyian ni dengan tidur awal, malam ni aku dah tak larat tidur awal :)

So I'm getting back to my self, fikir dalam-dalam dan mengungkit. LOL. Let me get it straight! Recently, I had a "di-angin-lalu" talk with an old friend. He told me, kau jangan manja-manja sangat dgn partner kau sekarang. Lelaki ni senang rimas, nanti jadi macam ****. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFU. Yes. Aku pandang muka dia dan senyum. Tak mampu nak membalas. Takut dia mampus kena siat.

\\Honestly man, you don't know a thing about me.

Teringat la dulu, someone told me "even your exes setuju kau clingy". 

Sebab tu dia pergi.

You know, "kau pergi, semua yang pergi" matter the most to me. So I could met someone better. I don't know if telling other people about me, would make you slightly better. Idgaf. 

I know I'm not a good person. But you not in the place to judge.

Thanks a lot. But at least now I found someone who really loves me no matter how ugly my character. L for the haters.

 .

.

Lonely night are creeping in. I know my sad night are coming. Haunting me. Letting me to stay at the corner of my dark room, listening to Taylor's old song.